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I¡¯ve always been a bit of an extremist. So, when I learned that skin cancer runs in my mom¡¯s family, I started seeing a dermatologist immediately. And I was vigilant about it, too. I¡¯d literally take off all my clothes and make the doctor look everywhere during my annual exams. It was almost awkward.

I also became the ¡°mean¡± mom ¡ª the one who makes everyone else¡¯s kid wear a hat and sunscreen while they¡¯re playing outside.

So, when I was diagnosed with conjunctival melanoma ¡ª a rare type of eye cancer ¡ª in February 2015, I wasn¡¯t really concerned about losing my vision. I was only 30 at the time and my daughter was just 15 months old. But after Googling it ¡ª I know: the exact wrong thing to do ¡ª I was afraid I was going to die. So I was like, ¡°I¡¯ve got two eyes. Just take the bad one out. Let¡¯s go. ¡±

Thankfully, my doctor at MD Anderson was much calmer and more rational about it than I was. She told me, ¡°Look, we don¡¯t really have to do that anymore. And we have many other effective options to try first, before removing your eye.¡± As it turns out, she was right.

My sole eye cancer symptom

Ironically, I had one eye cancer symptom for half my life before I finally saw a doctor. I¡¯d been poked in the eye during a basketball game when I was 15, and it formed a small blood blister on my right cornea. The blister eventually went away, but it left behind a little brown pigment. I know now that conjunctival melanoma can start from any abnormal growth of cells like that, even a freckle. But back then, I just thought of it as residue from the eye injury, like a scar.

My eyes are naturally very dark brown, so the brown spot looked like a tiny part of my iris was leaking out. It wasn¡¯t big enough that people really started commenting on it until after my daughter was born in October 2013. I¡¯d noticed it growing while I was pregnant with her. But I¡¯d also had 20/20 vision or better all my life, so I¡¯d never been to an ophthalmologist.

Then my eye began feeling really itchy. I started blinking and rubbing it, and when I pulled my hand away, I saw a single drop of blood. That kind of spooked me, so I went to a local emergency room. The doctor there did a biopsy. And that¡¯s when I found out I had eye cancer.

Finding the right doctor for my eye cancer treatment

I could not wrap my head around my diagnosis. Most people who have it are older white guys in their 60s, pale with blue eyes. I am all brown, with a dark complexion just like my dad.

I became determined to learn as much as I could about eye cancer. As soon as I had an actual diagnosis, I downloaded 30 different scientific papers from the internet. The top three were specific to my exact type of cancer, and a doctor  at MD Anderson was the author of two of them. That cemented where I wanted to go. I called and made an appointment at MD Anderson, then drove the eight hours from Lubbock to Houston a few days later.

My eye cancer treatment

After discussing my history, looking at my records and conducting her own examination, my doctor prescribed four rounds of an eye-drop chemotherapy called mitomycin to treat my conjunctival melanoma. I¡¯d need to apply it four times a day for four days in a row, then wait 10 days before starting a new cycle.

Eye drops don¡¯t affect your whole body, so I didn¡¯t experience any of the usual chemotherapy side effects, such as nausea, fatigue or hair loss. But I was still essentially dropping poison in my eye every day, so it could definitely be painful. It also made my right eye super sensitive to light, and I¡¯d get headaches.

The chemotherapy eye drops kept the cancer at bay until I conceived my second child in late 2017. I watched the small dark spot getting bigger as my pregnancy progressed. After my son was born in August 2018, I learned that the cancer had returned. I had surgery to remove the growth, sparing my eyeball, and I completed five more rounds of eye-drop chemotherapy afterward. I¡¯ve been cancer-free since November 2018.

My life after eye cancer

My vision won¡¯t ever be 20/20 again. I¡¯ve also lost some mucosal cells, so my right eye gets uncomfortably dry at times. But I still have both eyes and I don¡¯t need corrective lenses to see, though I do have to wear eyeglasses that filter out blue light when I look at computers or other screens. So, if that¡¯s the worst thing I ever have to deal with, that is perfectly fine.

Most people can¡¯t actually see their cancer coming back. But I can look at the exact spot where it was in the sclera (the white part of my eyeball) every day, so I know where to look for it and what to look for (a brown haze). That¡¯s a little bit of a blessing.

Because the chances of eye cancer coming back are so high, I still have check-ups every three months at MD Anderson. For the four years I lived in Lubbock, I traveled the 500+ miles to see her in Houston quarterly. And since moving to Tennessee over the summer, I¡¯ve already traveled the 700+ miles from Clarksville once.

But I won¡¯t switch doctors or hospitals, no matter how far away I may move. MD Anderson is the best cancer hospital in the world. I see that now more clearly than ever.

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